2 year old Christian was having constant tantrums. Mom had been completely frustrated. Now, when she notices a tantrum coming on, she gives him a choice. She noticed that they occur on leaving a place or when he doesn't get his way. When it's time to leave, she will say, "Would you like to go in your stroller or walk?" Christian happily chooses one or the other and leaves willingly. If he doesn't have his way, she offers him a choice of two acceptable alternatives and he willingly chooses. She noticed that he still has tantrums just as often, but they are being redirected almost immediately and not escalating out of control. Great job, mom, finding a tool that works on those tantrums!
Danelle Bradley, Moorpark
My child is 6 nearly 7 he has aspegers and the tantrums are bad all for the same reason that not getting his on way. I try to give him acceptable alternatives but if they are not to do with what he wants thats it. would love some help as I am struggling to be the best parent for him. cheers
What a neat way to phrase the question. Not giving them a question that requires a yes or no answer will is a great way to avoid those tantrums. Thanks for sharing!
Let him have space to tantrum. It validates his feelings. It validates. Don’t you feel the child is having a tantrum because he needs something from his own self or you emotionally? He is going through therapy. Let him be in his tantrum. Let him figure it out, but don’t leave him. Be with him there. Let him have space. It validates his feelings. It validates. With redirection, you are invalidating his emotions and telling him he should not cry or be upset. It tells him, you cannot have feelings. I disagree with redirecting altogether. I feel it doesn’t allow them to feel or express. Let people look or stare, this is your kid. If it is uncomfortable for you to watch them be upset, then be uncomfortable. It is sad to see, but it is SO necessary for development and totally normal. We should have more kids and adults crying in this world. Wouldn’t it be nice to have some freedom to show emotion once in a while?
As a parent of three children under the age of three this will come in very handy. Thanks!